


Manners Make the Man, But You Liked Me First

by CallisaRose



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Anal Sex, Because they're in hogwarts, Crack, Face-Sitting, Firewhisky, Flavored Lube, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Gratuitous Swearing, I mean, I mention snape, I'd apologize if I could stop laughing, M/M, Power Bottom, Shenanigans, Underage Drinking, all idols mentioned having sex are 18+, but the characters are underage, it rains teenage boys, pre-coital, so they have to be, they're teenage boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:40:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22331248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallisaRose/pseuds/CallisaRose
Summary: Lee Jeno has been planning his relationship with Na Jaemin since he first saw him on the Hogwarts Express when they were eleven. Five-and-a-half years later, they're close friends and he's ready to take the plunge. Wait, is he?AKA- No one eats salad at Hogwarts. Why is most of Dream falling through a ceiling? And Jaemin's favorite apology involves butteerbeer-flavored lube.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Comments: 7
Kudos: 191





	Manners Make the Man, But You Liked Me First

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sunshineandeyebrows](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshineandeyebrows/gifts).



> Okay lovelies, LISTEN UP! For the purposes of this fic, all dreamies + Lucas are the SAME AGE. I know they aren’t IRL, but we’re gonna roll with it okay? Okay. ALSO I wanted two of our angels per house so even I am questioning some of my sorting decisions, but let’s roll with it! 
> 
> The idols having sex are all 18+, but they're at Hogwarts, so the characters themselves are 16. If that bothers you, PLEASE DON'T READ!! 
> 
> Infinite thanks to my beta love, @syzygied (check her out)!
> 
> This fic is a birthday gift to my soulmate and eternal angel @sunshineandeyebrows (check her out!), I hope you love it, babe!

Jeno Lee was an ass. He knew he was, but that wasn’t going to stop him from following through with his plans. See, on his very first day at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, he’d fallen in love. Not the kind of passionate, all-encompassing love fabricated by love potions but the slow, gentle, burning love that he likened to a fire reduced to coals. It was warm, delicate, and dangerous- if only because it could lure someone into complacency but could still burn with contact or spit sparks. But Jeno was a Ravenclaw- he was smart enough to know things wouldn’t fall into place on their own. 

Over the last five and a half years, he had carefully tended to his desires. He stoked the embers and did his best to light a similar fire in the heart of one of his closest friends. Of course, getting close enough to Jaemin Na to call him a friend had taken long enough on its own. Jaemin had always been beloved, an example of pretty and popular ever since he set foot on the Hogwarts express. His charm, looks, and disposition had led to half their year clamoring for his attention in the beginning. 

Of course, acting every bit the noble Gryffindor he was, Jaemin had found his first true friend in the initial outcast of his dorm. Mark Lee became the hurdle to Jaemin’s friendship. Jeno had no clue how it had happened, but a month into their first year, Mark and Jaemin had become inseparable. Mark came out of his shell around Jaemin, and the test was borne. When people attempted to befriend the duo- success or failure came from Mark’s shyness abating or persisting. It wasn’t intended, but Jaemin didn’t grow close to people Mark couldn’t relax around.

Since the war that ended Voldemort’s reign of terror, many historians had come forth claiming that stronger ties to and from Slytherin house across generations could have saved countless lives. As such, the Hogwarts staff refused to take any chances and had immediately made inter-house relationships a priority. Therefore, students were paired off to work with those from different houses for projects and in-class work. 

This was where Fortune had first smiled upon him: in first year he was assigned to the same bench as Mark in potions. Now, Mark Lee wasn’t stupid. But he really didn’t have the finesse or attention span for potions work. Jeno had initially been horrified by his neighbor. Where he delicately stirred, sautéed, and sliced, Mark had splashed, seared, and squashed with great enthusiasm. 

At first, Jeno had resolved to leave Mark to his own devices, but after their first assignments were passed back, Mark looked close to tears. With evidence that Mark actually cared about his marks, Jeno had offered to help. Each week they spent several hours studying together in the library. Jeno had even dragged Mark over to the Ravenclaw table a few times to show him the different ways to cut, crush, and grind ingredients (demonstrated on their lunches and the salad that no one ever seemed to touch).

Eventually, Mark relaxed around Jeno too. He went from timid and reserved to sarcastic and unexpectedly witty. Eventually they began studying for other subjects together, which lead to the natural introduction of Jeno’s closest Ravenclaw friend Renjun and Jaemin into their library dates. 

From there, they grew to include all four houses. The Hufflepuffs, Lucas and Chenle had already cozied up to a pair of Slytherins, Jisung and Donghyuck. Their groups merged after a spirited prank war ended with all eight of them in the hospital wing sneezing glitter and coughing up feathers. Really, they didn’t have a choice. None of them could keep a straight face when Jisung’s death glare was interrupted by rainbow sparkles bursting from his nose, blanketing Lucas.

Now, they were in their sixth year and unwaveringly considered one another family. They had supported one another through countless exams, embarrassments, and crushes, sometimes on each other. When Mark had confessed to him in third year, Jeno had been shocked. He was so in love with Jaemin that he never considered that someone else may have wanted him. When he let him down though, Mark had taken it gracefully. He had said he just wanted Jeno to know, so they were all on the same page. 

In fourth year, Mark went to Jeno again- this time to tell him that he wanted help asking Donghyuck out. Around the same time Hyuck had gone to Chenle for the same advice. Three howlers, two confessions, and one Entrance Hall kiss later, they were in a relationship. And Mark was blushing from head to toe. They had been together ever since.

No matter how close they were though, Jeno hadn’t told any of them how he felt about Jaemin. He didn’t want to complicate their dynamic or risk someone else telling him. After all, Jeno was an ass. An ass with a plan. 

Around the time Mark and Hyuck got together, Jaemin had started looking at him differently. It began slowly- a hitch in his breath when they wrestled during snowball fights or eyes lingering on Jeno’s lips when he bit them from nerves. Jeno didn’t push him. Much. He needed Jaemin to know that he was available, and unattainable. Even to him it felt petty, but he knew nothing caught Jaemin’s eye faster than something he was told he couldn’t have.

In their third year, Jaemin had gorged himself on sweets during their first trip to Hogsmeade and had gotten sick. Renjun had told him to lay off the desserts for the rest of the day, so naturally, at dinner, Jaemin ran over to Renjun and Jeno at the Ravenclaw table, clutching a massive sundae in a bowl and shrieked _ICE CREAM_ in his ear as he galloped by. They later learned that Hyuck had dared him to when they parted ways walking into the Great Hall. 

So, when Jeno noticed that Jaemin’s attitude towards him was changing, he went on a few dates. He never went on more than three with the same person and he made sure he didn’t go out with enough people to gain a reputation. He just wanted to be sure that it was clear he was interested in dating, just not _Jaemin._ In retrospect, he really appreciated the experience he got on those dates. He made friends outside of his little family and got to know what he liked sexually and romantically. 

Of course, he wasn’t the only one who tried dating other people. At one time or another they all went out with students outside of their friend group. So far, none of them had stuck. Each time Jaemin came to the group telling them that his current fling had ended, Jeno thanked every god he could think of. The only time he’d celebrated a fling beginning was the first time Jaemin had gone out with another boy. He knew what he was risking with his game, but he hoped that if Jaemin chose someone else, he’d love him enough to let him go. Even if it shattered him. 

Not that he was actually worried. He’d set his plan in motion over four years ago, and so far, it had gone swimmingly. Ish. From what he could tell, Jaemin had moved from questioning his feelings to having a fully-fledged crush on him (he refused to acknowledge it may be more) around the Easter Holidays of last year. It was now October, and he worried that if he let Jaemin think his feelings were one-sided for much longer, that Jaemin would try to get over them. Or worse, he would _actually_ get over them. 

He had amended his plan as they grew up, great romantic gestures plotted at eleven didn’t often hold up at sixteen years old. He had gotten to know Jaemin, learned how to make him throw his head back in laughter or smile demurely at the ground. He knew what made Jaemin’s breath catch. They may all be friends, but none of them were shy about skinship and _bro cuddles,_ as Mark and Jisung dubbed them. He had noticed in the last six months what made his friend react.

The problem was that he had been hoping to get together at the beginning of the Christmas Holidays. That would give them plenty of time to establish their relationship and to bask in the honeymoon phase before the new term. Plus, he hoped that at that rate, they would be ready to have sex by his birthday in April. He wasn’t a virgin, but he thought that sleeping with the love of his life when he legally became a man would be the best way to celebrate. 

This would have been the perfect timeline, _if_ he hadn’t begun to worry that December would be too late. So, the plan had changed. He decided that Halloween would be as good a time as any to see if his years of preparation would work in his favor. That gave him exactly two weeks to make sure that everything was ready and that he hadn’t forgotten anything. Which was fine. He was fine. He could do this. If he could just _do_ this. 

Every year, at the Halloween Feast, he and his friends snuck away during dessert and spent the night in The Shrieking Shack. They started the tradition when they were second years, and a fourth year Gryffindor had challenged Mark to spend two hours inside. The fourth year hadn’t said Mark had to go alone, and by the end of the first hour, they had a new ritual. 

Last year, Hyuck and Chenle had managed to smuggle in a bottle of firewhisky and they’d gotten so tipsy and rambunctious that a few villagers resumed the whispers about a malevolent spirit haunting the place. He was pretty sure the most referenced moment had come from Lucas stubbing his toe on a warped floorboard. 

This year, he would just have to make sure that he and Jaemin got a little time alone. Preferably in the room downstairs that they had slowly converted into a giant pillow fort. They had draped a few bedsheets from the ceiling in a tent-shape and littered the ground with pillows and blankets to give the room a homier feel. That was where they usually hung out when they slipped away for _family time._ On Halloween they only crashed there after the excitement of slipping away wore off- they spent most of the night in the shabbier parts of the house to maintain the _authenticity_ of the whole affair. 

His other problem lay in the fact that he really wanted to keep this between himself and Jaemin, but knew that, just this once, it would be better to have someone make sure that things went to plan. So now, he was stuck in the library glaring at the open pages of _Advanced Potion Making_ trying to figure out which of his moronic friends he could trust with this. 

The obvious choice was Renjun- they were both Ravenclaws, so they had shared a room for the better part of five years. Renjun was respectful and would do anything he could to help. Which was exactly why it couldn’t be Renjun- if he started acting oddly everyone would guess that he and Jeno were up to something. By that logic, the best choice was Chenle; he had no filter and was chaotic enough that they usually went along with what he wanted if it would spare them unnecessary whining. But Chenle literally had _no filter,_ and Jeno knew that everyone, including Jaemin would know within the hour. 

Mark wouldn’t lie to Jaemin to save Hyuck’s life, and Hyuck would tell Jaemin what was going on the moment he got bored and wanted to create some drama. That left Lucas or Jisung. Lucas or Jisung. The culmination of his entire romantic life would depend on Lucas or Jisung, and honestly, he wondered if he could make a whole new set of friends in the next two weeks. He decided that making a rushed decision would be stupid, so he sat back and waited for Fortune to smile upon him _one more time._ A few moments later, he looked up at the sound of muffled footsteps and frowned. He wasn’t sure he agreed with the universe’s decision, but he had gotten this far trusting in small signs and coincidences--he wasn’t about to stop that now. 

~*~*~

Before he knew it, it was Halloween. It was _motherfucking Halloween_ and he was nowhere near ready. Not that there was anything left to do, but his meticulous planning and anal attention to detail could only get him so far. _FUCK._ Within 24 hours he would either have a boyfriend or a drastic need for a forgetfulness potion. 

He went through the motions of his day, practically vibrating out of his seat the later it got. After the third time he walked into a doorframe trying to leave a room, Renjun shot him a glare and stalked ahead. Jeno could tell he knew that he was keeping something from him. He felt awful, but he could be an ass for another 12 hours if it meant he had a chance at finally getting Jaemin to date him. But Jeno wasn’t enough of an ass to let Renjun believe he didn’t trust him for the next twelve hours. 

“Renjun, wait-“ he called out, hurrying to catch his friend disappearing down a side corridor. 

“I swear, Lee, this better be fucking important,” Renjun bit out, turning to glare up at him through his fringe. 

“It is, and I promise, I just… trust me on this? If I wasn’t totally paranoid that talking about it would ruin it, I would have told you ages ago,” he plastered on his best puppy-dog eyes, leaning against the cool stone of the corridor. 

Renjun heaved a sigh, but Jeno could see the irritation fading from his eyes. 

“Fine, but if I wake up with itching powder on my junk or to another decoy detonator wake-up call, you better learn to live without sleep.”

Jeno huffed a laugh and tossed an arm over his friend’s shoulder, “I promise, if any of that happens it won’t be because of me.”

“Doesn’t matter, it’s still on your head you lying piece of shit.” Renjun grumbled, wrapping an arm around Jeno’s waist and steering them towards lunch. “And for the record, you’ve been weird for at least a week now. I _waited_ for you to tell me what was going on, but since you hate me now, I guess I’ll have to find out with the rest of the rabble.”

“You mean our friends?”

“Yes, exactly.”

Jeno leaned into the familiar comfort of his friend and felt some of the tension bleed from his shoulders as they made their way down the marble staircase. 

~*~*~ 

The tension had not bled from his shoulders- it had simply relocated to the pit of his stomach. His nerves danced like he’d swallowed a bag of cockroach clusters without chewing them first. A sensation, he was ashamed to admit, he knew firsthand. He ate a little of everything that was within an arm’s-reach, then did his best to be inconspicuous as dinner progressed. If the staff noticed them leaving, his plan was ruined. He couldn’t draw attention to himself. 

When dinner vanished, so did his ability to breathe. _Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK._ He knew better than to consider worst-case scenarios, there was no point wallowing in things that hadn’t happened- _yet,_ his brain supplied. 

A sudden cold, dripping sensation jolted him from his thoughts. Renjun glared at him pointedly, and Jeno mentally shook himself, casting the disillusionment charm on Renjun in turn. The desserts had appeared, tables groaning beneath piles and piles of sugary delicacies and tempting treats. Disillusionment wasn’t foolproof, but it helped them vanish more subtly in the rush of students launching themselves into the heaped-up sweets.

They slid from the bench as the smell of caramel and tart fruit wafted gently towards him. When he got to the doors, he glanced regretfully back at the tables, only to catch Headmaster Kibum raising an eyebrow most-decidedly in their direction. He froze, but the headmaster merely rolled his eyes and waved subtly at the door while pointedly turning towards Professor Yesung to his right. Taking a gulp of air, he anchored himself to Renjun’s robes as they slipped into the Entrance Hall. 

~*~*~

“I swear, Headmaster Kibum winked right at me when I was leaving,” Jisung whined for the fifth time. Not that Jeno was counting. 

“Jisung, let’s say he _did_ see us leaving, and didn’t care. Do you think in any universe, he would _look right at you_ and essentially give you _permission_ to leave?” Lucas reasoned, digging through their pile of candy on the warped floor of the bedroom.

Donghyuck tossed a licorice wand at Jisung’s head. 

“Fine,” Jisung growled, sinking his teeth into the treat, “whatever. You’re right, I’m seeing things and Mark is suddenly a Potions whiz.”

“Hey,” Mark whined from Donghyuck’s lap, “don’t bring me into this!”

“Your other half brought you into this by existing.”

“Good come back, did you think of that yourself?” Chenle cackled, reclining against the moth-eaten bed-skirt. 

They had dragged their favorite pillows into the ransacked bedroom to surround the mound of candy and cakes that Lucas had brought. He always managed to charm his way into extra food from the house elves. Jeno had no idea how he did it, but he didn’t press it. They had three bottles of firewhisky and a bag of Zonko’s products in the house with them- the food would be their only savior. A terrible combination really, but they needed some way to guarantee that other adventurous students wouldn’t make it too far into the house. 

Chenle uncorked the bottles of firewhisky and set them on the rusting end table that Jaemin wrangled into place over the food mini-mountain. 

“Okay, asshats, what game do we want to start with?” Donhyuck asked. He rolled dramatically to the side, tipping Mark off his lap. Mark hit the ground with a squeak of protest- from himself and the floorboards. 

Mark righted himself with a dubious look at the structure around them before grabbing a bottle and nervously taking a swig. He hated being upstairs. Jaemin tugged the bottle from Mark’s grasp, brought it to his lips, and tipped his head back too.

Jeno panicked, he had expected they would pace themselves on the drinking. He had to keep Jaemin from getting blackout for the next two hours at least. He grimaced and grabbed another bottle, taking a quick sip before setting it back on the stool, hoping Jaemin would follow suit. He did. Jeno grinned and winked as warmth chased the mouthful of alcohol through his system.

“How about exploding snap?” he offered. 

“NO- no. No exploding anything while we’re up here, you arrogant ass,” Mark protested. 

Jaemin looked determinately around the group before suggesting, “Truth, dare, or drink?”

Jeno groaned, but he was the only one who seemed ready to protest. 

“What’s the matter, Lee?” Renjun taunted, looking entirely too satisfied to be playing the worst game they’d ever discovered, “scared?”

If Jeno lived through this night, he was never keeping anything from Renjun again. The bastard was entirely too sadistic when insulted. His tone seemed to catch everyone’s attention, they were all staring challengingly at him now. 

“Of course I’m not scared, I’d just prefer not to die tonight so…” 

“Don’t worry,” Jisung purred from his reclined position on a chenille pillow, “we don’t have any plans to kill you.”

Jeno had never been more convinced that he was about to die. Four rounds later, Jeno’s anxiety was at an all-time high. No one had drunk too much, but the dares and questions were terrifyingly tame. It was like they had all conspired to kill him via drawn-out suspense. His heart raced any time someone called on him, but they hadn’t asked him anything worse than _If you had to use edible lube, what flavor would you want?_

The lack of chaos was completely driving him mad. When his heart managed to quiet down, he became too aware of his body. His palms were sweating against the floor, increasing his risk of getting a splinter by the minute. His tailbone ached through the well-worn cushion he sat on, and his whole body was back to vibrating at a frequency he believed could rival a banshee’s wail. His friends were planning something. And he had never wanted to bang their heads together like coconuts more. 

He flinched slightly when Chenle dared Jaemin to give Lucas a lap dance. He was already on overdrive, he didn’t want to know what an erection would do to him now, in fact he was terrified to find out. Unfortunately for him, Jaemin took both the dare and the shot, and he spent the next few minutes grinding on Lucas’s lap like it was his job. Renjun and Donghyuck accompanied him by singing some old love ballad at what had to be three times the intended tempo. Chenle tried to keep a beat through his giggles. The creaking floor acted as a metronome, and Jaemin went so far as to tug his shirt off and wave it in the air before collapsing in a pile of giggles. Jeno sat stock-still doing his absolute best to will his sudden erection down. 

They had all seen each other hard before, it happened when you practically lived piled on top of one another, but Jeno had _never_ gotten hard around them because of Jaemin. He had kept that part of his horniness locked tightly beneath the surface. Only now, when he was already so on edge, suddenly he was… well, on the edge. He was convinced, that all it would take for him to blow his load was a few well-placed looks and a hand on his thigh. He yelped when one of Lucas’s huge hands landed on his thigh. 

“What?” he whined. He felt like they were all playing a game and he was decidedly losing.

“Jaemin asked you- truth, dare, or drink?” Lucas’s smirk was way too satisfied. 

He looked around at the faces of his friends. He knew he was royally fucked when Renjun met his eye with a wink. 

He sighed, defeated. Whatever Renjun had planned was going to take over the rest of this night. He could tell. Maybe he could plan something for Guy Fawkes day? He’d heard muggleborns chattering about the holiday in early November and it seemed to involve fireworks, so he could work with that… 

“Earth to Jeno?” Jisung sniggered, shooting sparks past his shoulder to get his attention. 

“Yeah? Oh, right… Um…” he had already offered truths and dares to several of his friends. He had no clue what they wanted from him now. “Truth?” he squeaked. Jaemin’s eyes latched onto his face greedily. Jeno wiped his sweaty palms down his trousers. 

“Okay,” Jaemin replied, leveling him with a steady look. In all his shirtless glory. There was a bead of sweat slipping down his chest. Jeno was _so, fucking fucked,_ “are you ever going to make a move on me, you fucking, asshole coward?”

“I- WHAT?” he spluttered. 

“Oh for Merlin’s sake,” Jaemin snarled, latching onto Jeno’s forearm with a bruising grip. Jeno staggered to a crouch, tripping after Jaemin the entire way down the rickety stairs. 

From above them, he heard Lucas ask, “So, uh, whose turn is it now?” before the door slammed shut with a flick of Jaemin’s wrist. 

“Jaemin, listen, I-“ Jeno began, floundering for an explanation, but he was cut off with a withering look. 

“No, Jeno, you don’t get to explain your stupid, infuriating reasoning to me yet. Right now, all I fucking care about is you screwing me six ways sideways into this floor before I castrate you for being a bigger pain in my ass than that novelty dildo Donghyuck got me for Secret Santa last year.”

Jeno gaped, “You fit that thing _in your ass?!?”_

“No, Jeno,” Jaemin said, angrily shucking his trousers off from the center of the remaining pillows, “I _tried_ to fit that stupid thing in my ass and it wouldn’t go in past the head.”

Jeno had honestly never seen Jaemin this angry before. He wasn’t even sure he’d ever seen Jaemin properly angry, but as he prowled towards him in nothing but a scowl, he knew he would do everything in his power to keep him from getting this mad again. Maybe. It was honestly pretty hot. 

With a withering look and a sneer that would rival the portrait of that hook-nosed potions master hanging in the dungeons, Jaemin backed Jeno into the wall behind him. 

“Take your clothes off now, or I’m going back upstairs and we’re discussing this in the morning.”

Jeno hastened to strip down, desperate to do anything to keep Jaemin down here with him. When he was naked, Jaemin pressed forward, delicately resting his hands on Jeno’s bare shoulders. He gently pushed, until Jeno’s back connected with a beam that had a chunk torn from it. The exposed end pressed into his skin and he hissed. Jaemin pulled him forward and looked towards him with worry in his eyes.

“I’m fine,” Jeno promised dipping his head to capture Jaemin’s lips in their first kiss. 

“Don’t you fucking dare, Jeno Lee,” Jaemin snarled at him, “You do everything in your power to make me fall for you, it works, and then you do _absolutely nothing_ for SIX MONTHS-“ 

Jeno flinched back from the rising pitch of Jaemin’s voice. Okay, so maybe he wasn’t as subtle as he’d thought. And maybe, he was in A Lot of trouble. But at least his reaction stopped Jaemin from shouting himself hoarse. 

“Look,” Jaemin pinched the bridge of his nose, “you _knew_ how I felt about you and you just kept stringing me along… I’m _so_ mad at you. I think I have every right to be mad at you. But I am also so infuriatingly horny and in love with you that if you don’t climb me like a tree in the next 30 seconds, I think I may implode.” Jaemin peeked at him through one eye, “Do you want to have sex tonight, or leave it until after we have the fight of our lives in the morning?”

Jeno gaped at him. He knew Jaemin wasn’t a virgin but had never expected he’d be so forward and brazen, “I… yes. Yes, I definitely want to have sex if that’s what you want.”

Jaemin glowered, “Okay, then we do this my way. I’m still furious with you, so you aren’t allowed to kiss me on the lips. I will not let our first kiss be ruined by your stupidity. Got it?”

Jeno nodded, his dick heavy between his legs. He gripped it and flicked his wrist once to alleviate some of the tension, Jaemin’s eyes narrowed as he watched the movement.

“Rule two: we take this at my pace. I waited way too long for you to make a move, I control the speed here. Is that alright?” Jaemin had bent over to dig through the pile of pillows for something. 

“Yes,” Jeno was practically salivating watching Jaemin’s ass wiggle on the floor.

Jaemin turned around, holding something in his hand. It was flavored lube. They had all _known_ the whole night. They had planned this… well, fuck. 

“Finally, if you don’t make me scream loud enough to frighten off the villagers for another year, our friends are allowed to subject you to that bag of Zonko’s products up there. Got it?”

“Yes,” Jeno breathed out. Was this really happening, or had someone slipped a patented daydream charm into his firewhisky earlier? Either way, he planned to ride this out until the end.

Jaemin threw the bottle of lube at him and settled himself on the pile of cushions with his ass in the air. Jeno swallowed thickly, he never could have imagined how good Jaemin looked on his hands and knees. 

“Come here,” Jaemin commanded, his voice sharp and clear. 

Jeno stumbled forward as though pulled by strings. He’d never been under the imperious curse, but he was pretty sure he understood the effects perfectly now. 

“You said I couldn’t kiss your lips, does that mean I’m allowed to kiss other things?”

Jaemin glanced behind his shoulder and let his eyes slide up and down Jeno’s body. His gaze lingered on his arms and chest before settling on his dick. 

“Only if you want to live until morning,” he mused. 

Jeno fell to his knees behind Jaemin, stroking one hand from his neck to the end of his tailbone placatingly. Jaemin’s skin was soft and smooth beneath his calloused fingers. He wanted to map Jaemin’s body with his hands and lips until Jaemin fell apart beneath him, but he could tell Jaemin didn’t have the patience for that tonight. 

“Did you get lost ba- “ Jaemin’s biting remark ended in a shuddering intake of breath. 

Jeno smirked from his position between Jaemin’s cheeks. He pressed his lips against Jaemin’s hole again and licked his lips. His saliva mixed with what tasted like, maybe butterscotch? Did Jaemin have butterscotch scented bath products? Then he remembered the edible lube. He whined and dived back in. His baby, his Jaemin still tasted like lube he had used earlier. 

He let his tongue slip out to taste Jaemin, just barely flicking across his furled hole. Another shaky inhale from him was all the encouragement he needed. Jeno dumped a liberal coating of the edible lube between Jaemin’s cheeks before dropping the bottle by his knee. He dodged the slap Jaemin sent his way with a whimpered _cold_ then adjusted his grip on Jaemin’s ass, spreading him wide open beneath him. 

With his heart hammering in his chest, Jeno bent forward. He ducked down and lapped up the lube slipping towards Jaemin’s balls and nearly moaned. It tasted exactly like butterbeer. He licked a broad stripe from Jaemin’s testicles to his hole then lost himself to flicking his tongue tantalizingly over his entrance. Jaemin was more responsive than he could have dreamed, his breathing was labored and each time Jeno drew back teasingly, Jaemin gasped at the loss. 

When he felt Jaemin shift beneath him, he swiped a finger through the mess of lube between Jaemin’s cheeks and pressed lightly against the pucker. 

“Are you sure Jae-“

“Yes, I’m sure. And unless you’re playing the most wildly inappropriate game of chicken, you’re sure too. I know neither of us has anything contagious or infectious so, for the love of my ass, can we skip the damned formalities? If I go too far, give me a word to stop.” 

“Bicycle,” Jaemin raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment, “yours?”

“You lose.” The phrase was accompanied by a smirk.

Jeno had no clue how Jaemin had flipped from panting mess to commanding brat so quickly, but Jaemin was right- he had never been more sure of anything in his life. He pressed a bit harder with his finger and it slid in to the second knuckle. Jeno’s breath caught. Jaemin was warm and pliant and, _loose._ Jeno choked on his next inhale as Jaemin rocked greedily back onto Jeno’s hand. 

“Like I said,” he purred, “my pace.”

Jeno started shaking, desperate to make Jaemin fall apart. “Ride my face,” he blurted out and Jaemin turned to look at him in awe. 

Apparently Jaemin didn’t need telling twice: the moment Jeno settled back on the musty pillows, Jaemin straddled his face and braced his hands on Jeno’s chest. Jeno slipped his hands around Jaemin’s narrow waist and tugged his hips down until the scent of butterbeer and saliva flooded him, masking mildew-y pillows. 

He was hard. He also knew at some point he had begun leaking- he could feel the small puddle of precome dripping onto his pelvis. Jaemin was a solid weight above him, and the moment he gave his side a reassuring squeeze, he started rocking his hips. Jeno did his best to keep pace, but Jaemin was clearly in a rush.

He ground back onto Jeno’s mouth, blunt nails scrabbling for purchase on his ribcage. Jeno bucked up at the searing tracks left up and down his chest and tried to pull Jaemin closer to him. He could hardly breathe, he was delirious with sensation. His cock throbbed, neglected and angry between his legs. Above him, Jaemin whined and moaned and mewled, as Jeno worked him over as well as he could. When he began trembling, Jeno squeezed his thigh gently, and Jaemin rose to his knees. 

“Oh, look at you,” Jaemin panted when they turned to face one another, “you look positively ruined.”

Jeno knew he was right, he could feel the lube and saliva coating his chin, and he had drooled enough that some dripped lazily down his throat. His chest was a maze of red lines, and his dick twitched, painfully hard and an angry red. Not that Jaemin looked any less debauched. His hair stuck up in tufts from where he’d run his hands through it and his chest was heaving. His eyes were sultry and slightly unfocused. Jeno had never seen anything so beautiful in his entire life.

Jaemin crawled towards the cleanest of the cushions and got back on all fours. He presented his slick hole to Jeno and crooked a finger in his direction. Jeno obediently followed, then nearly collapsed when Jaemin unceremoniously stuffed three of his own fingers into his ass. He keened loudly, rocking back onto his own hand, staring Jeno down challengingly. The message was pretty damn clear: _I shouldn’t be louder with myself than I am with you._

He pulled his hand from his ass and raised it towards Jeno to lick clean. He felt another painful dribble of precome spurt from his neglected cock, licking the sweet, warm slick from Jaemin’s fingers. Jaemin pressed two of them to the back of his mouth and pressed down. Jeno gagged. Jaemin’s head tipped to the side in indifference as he retracted the fingers and ran them through Jeno’s hair, cleaning them off. His mask cracked slightly, when Jeno leaned into the touch. He smiled, his eyes slipping into familiar crescents. He sat up, pecked Jeno on the cheek, then promptly collapsed back onto his hands and knees. 

“Baby, I need you to fuck me like you’re sorry, okay? Do you think you can do that for me?” Jaemin cooed at him. 

Jeno knew this was deliberate. Few things could cut through his gentle disposition like condescension could, and Jaemin knew that as well as he did. Jeno hunted for the lube, and poured another stream of cold gel down Jaemin’s crack. This time, Jaemin’s swat landed on his thigh as he whined about the cold again. The small sting on his leg reminded him of the marks criss-crossing his chest.

With a guttural moan, Jeno took Jaemin’s ass in his hands again, spreading him open. Jaemin’s hole was already a mess, Jeno watched him clench reflexively and stared transfixed as a dribble of lube slipped from him. He dipped two fingers into the mess of saliva, lube, and more lube to coat his dick with, then promptly lined himself up. Jaemin wiggled beneath him; apparently apology sex didn’t include savoring the moment. With a last inhale and prayer to any god listening that this wasn’t some vivid dream, he pressed forward into Jaemin’s tight heat.

Jaemin gave a shout that could probably be heard from the Astronomy Tower when he bottomed out in one thrust. Heat flooded his senses and he braced himself against Jaemin as he struggled against the tidal wave of pleasure threatening to overcome him.

“Fucking hell, Jaemin. Are you trying to invite everyone in Hogsmeade to listen in?”

At that, Jaemin keened again. Interesting. He would have to explore that eventually. When he wasn’t one mildew scented breeze from blowing his load. 

“Move,” Jaemin commanded through his teeth. 

“Look, I’m trying to make this experience, uh, last if you get the-“

“Do you need me to bind it so that you don’t finish too fast? Or can you keep it together for the two minutes it’ll take for me to come?” 

“I’ll keep it together,” he bit back. This bossy motherfucking angel was going to be his undoing. 

Experimentally, he rolled his hips. The overwhelming pressure and warmth shot through him again, but Jaemin’s hesitant whimper cut through the sensation. He wanted to hear that noise again, but louder. He wanted their friends just upstairs to hear that noise. He wanted all of fucking Scotland to hear the noises Jaemin made when he was buried balls deep inside him. 

He adjusted his grip, so he was holding Jaemin by the lithe waist, and pulled out slightly. He slammed back in and Jaemin choked on a moan. _That_ was the most beautiful thing he had ever heard. 

Slowly, but surely Jeno picked up a rhythm. He mixed rough, shallow thrusts with fast plunges into Jaemin’s body. He ground his hips in circles and let his grip anchor him. He let Jeno’s cries of _faster, harder, fuck yes there yes there yes there_ fill his mind. He was nearly gasping for breath, sweat running down his chest in rivulets. Jaemin’s back had taken on an otherworldly sheen. His cock was begging for release, but he had detached slightly from his own needs, chasing after the strangled cries of the boy beneath him. 

He released Jaemin’s hips and pressed between his shoulder blades until he collapsed face first into the blanket beneath his torso. Jeno drove down into him and the new angle made Jaemin shout. He paused a moment, worried he’d gone too far but quickly resumed his pace when a chorus of _fuck you fuck you why’d you stop_ reached his ears. He resumed his pace but a few short minutes later, his body’s needs made themselves blatantly clear. 

Jaemin had started a chant of _SoCloseSoCloseSoClose, ‘m gonna come untouched Jeno, pleaase_ when Jeno came abruptly. Agonizing pleasure ripped through him and he felt Jaemin clench, milking his orgasm from him even while he wailed. What felt like a lifetime later, Jeno blinked back into the shabby room where Jaemin was weakly pushing back on his softening dick, desperately trying to chase his own release. 

Jeno pulled out and dropped to his haunches behind Jaemin. He roughly shoved four fingers inside of him and immediately began pumping them in and out. He reached around for Jaemin’s dick, but his hand was slapped away. 

“If you don’t make me come untouched, we’ll be here until you do. _That’s_ how you’re apologizing to me, ass,” Jaemin ground out. Jeno bent to lick along the puffy rim of Jaemin’s ass, curling his fingers as he plunged them in and out of Jaemin. Just when his tongue threatened to cramp, Jaemin’s cries pitched higher than ever. His whole frame shook and his pleas took on a desperate edge. In a moment of inspiration, Jeno removed the hand holding Jaemin’s hips up, and brought it down, hard, on Jaemin’s ass. 

Jaemin shrieked again, and Jeno felt his passage clamp down as he came on his fingers. Wearily, he milked him through it before pulling his hand free and collapsing doggedly on top of him. After a few moments of stunned silence, Jaemin started to wriggle against him. 

“Get off of me you fucking brute.” Jaemin grunted. 

Lazily, Jeno wrapped his arms around Jaemin’s middle and rolled to the side, taking him with him. Jaemin squirmed in his arms until he faced Jeno properly, then bit his nose. 

“Ow, what the fuck was that for?” he yelped, recoiling as far as he could without letting go of his waist. Jaemin merely raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Yeah, okay, fine. I deserved that,” he conceded. 

“Just, before I decide to fully forgive you, how long?” Jaemin looked like Jeno’s answer might just break him. 

“Six months. I… I thought you might have liked me around Easter,” Jeno confessed. 

Jaemin merely raised his eyebrow again, clearly disbelieving.

“Okay, I’ve been trying to get you to like me for a couple years now,” the eyebrow climbed higher, “Okay fine!” he conceded, “I’ve been trying to get you to go out with me since our first year. On like the first day…”

“You WHAT?” Jaemin yelped in his ear, “You’ve been trying to get me to date you for FIVE AND A HALF YEARS, and I still had to be the one to make a move?? I guess it’s nice to know that you liked me first…”

Jeno winced, “Actually, I _was_ trying to make a move. Tonight. I just, uh…” he let his sentence trail off- what time was it? Crap, if they’d taken as long as he thought, shit was due to hit the fan at any minute. 

As if heralded by his own thoughts, a loud explosion went off outside of the Shrieking Shack. He heard a commotion coming from upstairs and next thing he knew, six terribly spooked sixteen-year-olds crashed into the room. Through the ceiling. Which had finally decided to call it quits. Jaemin shrieked as their friends came raining down with a mountain of candy and three mostly-gone bottles of firewhisky clutched in their arms. 

“What the fuck was that?” Donghyuck yelled, clutching a horribly frightened Mark to his chest. 

Renjun was giving Jeno a death glare that he knew meant trouble when he could no longer shield himself with Jaemin. 

“Uh, hold on a sec?” Jeno made his way to a window and shot green sparks from it. A moment later, blue sparks answered in the sky.

“Explain,” Jisung seethed, clutching a bottle of firewhisky to his chest the same way Mark was plastered to Hyuck.

Jeno sighed, “That was Professor Yesung. He, uh, approached me a couple weeks ago. Apparently my pining was just as obvious to him as it was to you guys and he offered to help me set up a situation that would give me and Jaemin a moment to talk alone.”

“By _murdering us?!”_ Chenle yelped. 

“Well, no. The floor wasn’t supposed to give out like that…”

“Wait, so Headmaster Kibum _did_ know we were leaving!” Jisung accused. 

“Dude, I don’t fucking know if Yesung told him, I only-”

“HOW HAS NO ONE YET MOCKED THEM FOR BEING NUDE?!?” Donghyuck bellowed.

Silence fell over their group of friends for a moment before Mark burst into giggles. 

“The president is nude,” he hiccuped. 

Everyone turned to stare at Mark’s resident translator- Hyuck.

“Don’t look at me,” he said with a shrug, “I think it’s some program he watched staying with his muggle family in Canada. He’s been saying shit like that since the year started.”

“My virgin eyes!” Chelne wailed, burying his head in Renjun’s chest. Beneath his shirt. Renjun muttered something that sounded like _virgin, your sore ass,_ and Jeno turned petrified towards Jaemin, who was wearing an equally horrified expression.

Mark meanwhile, seemed to be blissfully moving on from his untimely fall from the sky by singing an alphabet-themed song about some man named Jimmy Brown into one of the bottles of firewhisky. 

Donghyuck shoved a handful of peanut brittle into Mark’s hands and cradled him to his side while Mark happily munched away. 

“Wait, when did you guys get so pissed?” Jaemin asked, looking around. 

Three of their friends were still aggressively cuddling the bottles of firewhisky, which were alarmingly empty, and the other three had happily moved onto stuffing their faces with sweets. 

“Well,” Lucas swallowed around a mouthful of every flavor beans, “when Jaemin, er, got in the spirit… his muffliato failed,” he looked down at his empty hand morosely before seeing a mostly-unharmed cauldron cake in the pile of food and rubble and diving for it.

“Chenle wanted to tell you guys but Renjun said he’d skin anyone alive who bothered you, and we all know how scary he can be…” Jisung supplied between hearty swigs of firewhisky. 

“So,” Renjun supplied, “It was listen to our friends fuck each other sober, or. Well, not sober. Hyuck stayed sober-ish so we wouldn’t explode the Zonko’s shit.”

At that, Donghyuck looked up with a cruel grin, “I was starting to take bets about whether you were fucking or trying to maim each other when you, er… ended. Interesting kinks, I’ll give you that. I thought Jaemin was going to eat you alive, Lee,” Hyuck’s eyes flickered to Jeno’s marked up chest.

At that, Jaemin declared that it was bedtime. They banished the largest pieces of rubble to the side of the room and extinguished the candles they’d lit on their way in. Jaemin wiggled his way back into Jeno’s arms as they all migrated to their pillow pile, and nipped him on the nose again. 

“What in Merlin’s name was that one for?” he groaned. Jaemin was turning out to be way more violent than expected. 

“Not asking me to be your boyfriend yet,” Jaemin whispered. 

The moonlight filtering through the windows cast shadows in the room that crept across them all as their friends’ breathing leveled out. In this light, Jeno thought he looked a bit demonic, an unholy resemblance to Hyuck, but he wasn’t dumb enough to say it now. 

“Na Jaemin,” he murmured, “would you do me the honor of being my boyfriend?”

“You lose points for the lack of originality. But yes, if you think you can keep up,” Jaemin smiled sweetly. He tipped his face up to Jeno’s and they kissed slowly, lazily. Jaemin had been right, their first real kiss was worth saving. 

“You know, Na, his mouth was on some loser’s asshole earlier,” Hyuck called tiredly from across the cuddle puddle. 

“Yeah but _he’s_ kind of an ass, so it balances out,” Jaemin whispered against his lips, “Especially since he’s _my_ ass.”

They heard Hyuck fake retch for a moment before he fell silent as well. Holding the love of his life to his chest, Jeno smiled happily. Sure, he was an ass. But dammit if it wasn’t worth every agonizing moment and change in his master plan to get right here.

**Author's Note:**

> YAY!! You made it through! Thank you so much!!! 
> 
> Please leave comments and kudos if you enjoyed this- they make me want to write more and more often!!
> 
> IF you happen to be one of the (probably nonexistent) people waiting for an update on a previous fic, I promise, they're COMING SOON!! I got sidetracked...
> 
> Come yell at/with me on Twitter, @RoseCallisa my DMs are always open!


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